Getting back into the "Creative Habit"

I began to read this book by Twayla Tharp called "The Creative Habit". So here I go. She talks about finding your place during the day where you feel refreshed and you can do what you do best, then.
I have yet to find my time of day or my ways of doing so but this is a start. Right?

Left.

Right.

I'm still finding my self, my portals, my creativity, my ventilation. I do believe, dearest blogspot, that you are helping me; or perhaps I'm helping myself by typing things on a "daily" basis.

I sit here with my instant coffee, my Parliment lights and my 100 calorie fudge striped cookies and I think, well, this could be it. This is a start. Everyday is a start. I need to move. Move forward and quit dwelling on the precious time I've taken so much for granted. I will begin to use it wisely.

I complain too much and do too little. This is a FACT.

But it's snack time, coffee time, that time of day where you relax after you've actually done something.

Luckily, I have someone who pushes me and sees so much more in me than I ever gave myself credit for, my boyfriend. I realize it shouldn't take someone elses encouraging words for me to take action but sometimes, like in these times of my life, I need that. We need that.

So it's time to get into the habit. It's time to move on, to excersise, to better myself, to get back into school, to write more poetry, to start painting, to stop smoking, to start saving, to stop whining, to STOP complaining.

Here I go.

moderately necessary

The few bits of vitamin D are fading away, along with the last of the suns bright rays, for the day. Our evening melts in to the pinks, the oranges, the purples, the beauty.

But our sky always shines. Whether it be the stars or the clouds, the sun or the moon, there's always something more out there to look to.

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Contigo soy feliz y contigo se amar; nos sobran las maneras, los motivos, el tiempo y ocurre en todas partes.

With you I'm happy and with you I know how to love; there are too many ways,too many reasons, too much time and it happens everywhere.

Cuanta felicidad puede contener un solo cuerpo sin explotar y convertirse en estrella fugaz? Así quiero acabar yo, una luna en tu cielo cuando oscurece el mundo y se enfría. Una esporádica combustión y a la vez ser tu calor.

How much happiness can a single body contain before exploding and turning into a shooting star? That's how I want to end up. A light in your sky when the world turns dark and cold. A spontaneous combustion and also be your warmth.

Eres mi amor, mis pensamientos, hecho de mis besos y moldado con mis abrazos. Eres mi piel y mis cicatrices, mis pestañas y mis pies. Eres la sangre que recorre todo mi cuerpo regulando su temperatura. Me alimentas a cucharadas con tus sonrisas y chistes y me proteges con tus palabras, aparte de tu cuerpo.

You are my love, my thoughts, made from my kisses and molded by my hugs. You are my skin and my scars, my eyelashes and my feet. You are the blood circulating in my body, regulating its temperature. You feed me spoonfuls of your smiles and jokes and protect me with your words, along with your body.

Eres mi flor, con el centro color fuchsia expresando tu pasión por el amor y a la vez una diversión juvenil. Tus pétalos amarillos brillan como el ámbar, mandando vibraciones positivas a todo aquel que bendices con tu pura presencia. Llego a creer que hasta la Luna te tiene celos, puesto que es lo mas sagrado en mi pequeño universo.

You are my flower, with a fuchsia center, expressing your passion for love but also your playful youth. Your petals are yellow and shine like amber, sending positive vibrations to whoever you bless with your pure presence. I've come to believe that even the Moon is jealous of you, which is the most sacred thing in my small universe.

Mi Rey, de cuantas maneras TE QUIERO.

My King, how many ways I LOVE YOU.

relevant day-to-day matters

The main part of me is injured in four different areas, like the corners of a square. Four. I had my back adjusted today for the first time. I will have to be getting continuous treatment in order to fix it all and align my hips and shoulders again.

This explains so much pain. So much pain.

I'm too young for this. Someone,please, get me a drink. Also, if it isn't too much to ask, a job that offers health insurance. It would be like giving my lungs fresh air to breath and filtered water to drink and organic food to eat.

Is it true? Could it be?

We're both falling as fast as our hearts
go soaring away with our minds and play
in outer space they saw us wave
from down below they envied us.

We sat there, in this quaintly lit place.He dug into his pocket laying out the box of cigarettes on the table.I ordered a glass and blankly stared him in the eyes.

"I would've ordered you something better."

"I can make my own decisions. Thanks for the concern."
I flipped back the top and took one of his cigarettes.

He lit me. I took my first drag.

"When did you start smoking?"

"When did you leave?"

"Oh, that's not fair--"

"But, what makes you?"

Second drag. I wasn't going to bite my tongue.

"Why are we even here?"

"I'm not sure. Why are you here?"

"Why did you want to meet me? What is there to say?"

"Why did you agree?"

Sneer. Third drag. I had a sip of wine. It was dry, suiting the entire atmosphere.

"This was a bad idea."

"Yeah, you always were a bad idea."

He got up and left. Coward, couldn't ever stick around.

dreamy jambalaya

I take this with me.
This and a lot of you.
A lot that you cut in me.
Crevasses that need to be filled
with music and luxury.
Sweet nothings and plenty somethings.
With oceans and sunsets
but also with broken chairs and some ache.
I'm not looking,
you'll get here.
But come with lots of things to share
and experiences and books.
And write your own so I can read your way
but come quick!
I'm eager for the bay.
Excited for your existence
but not making any expectations.

You're simply my creation.

For now.

________________________________________________

Filled up to the tipping top
I take that back
I'm really not.

You've exposed me to more
than I would usual bargain for.
It ignites a new interest in me
but you and I can no longer be.

I look for these things
and my things.
But your things nonetheless.
And his, and his, and hers,
and so on, and so forth.

to be fulfilled, as I once was.
But it just doesn't take one anymore.
Now it takes one who has it all
because I know it all, now.